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| No dinner for this child at Cardinal Dolan's table. |
In my previous post I made the point that a celibate male priesthood has only the experience of being the child in the parent/child relationship and that leads to directly to a authoritarian paternal paradigm. There is never the kind of dialogue that carries on between parents and adult children. The following is from Cardinal Dolan's personal blog. It illustrates this issue in spades.
All Are Welcome!
April 25th, 2013
It was a lesson I began to learn when I was seven or eight . . .
My buddy Freddie from across the street and I were playing outside. Mom called me for supper.
“Can Freddie stay and eat supper with us?” I asked.
“He’d sure be welcome, if it’s okay with his mom and dad,” she replied.
“Thanks, Mrs. Dolan,” Freddie replied. “I’m sure it’s okay, because mom and dad are out, and the babysitter was just going to make me a sandwich whenever I came in.”
I was so proud and happy. Freddie was welcome in our house, at our table. We both rushed in and sat down.
“Freddie, glad you’re here,” dad remarked, “but . . . looks like you and Tim better go wash your hands before you eat.”
Simple enough . . . common sense . . . you are a most welcome and respected member now of our table, our household, dad was saying, but, there are a few very natural expectations this family has. Like, wash your hands!…
So it is with the supernatural family we call the Church: all are welcome!
But, welcome to what? To a community that will love and respect you, but which has rather clear expectations defining it, revealed by God in the Bible, through His Son, Jesus, instilled in the human heart, and taught by His Church.
The Church is Catholic . . . that means all are welcome;
The Church is one . . . that means we have a Person — Jesus — and His moral teaching that unite us;
The Church is apostolic . . . that means that His teaching was entrusted to His apostles, and carefully handed-on by His Church. The sacred duty of the Church is to invite people, challenge people, to live the message and teachings of Jesus.
This balance can cause some tensions. Freddie and I were loved and welcomed at our family table, but the clear expectation was, no dirty hands!
Blessed John Paul II used to say that the best way to love someone was to tell them the truth: To teach the truth with love. Jesus did that — He was love and truth in His very person — and so does His Church.
We love and respect everyone . . . but that doesn’t necessarily mean we love and respect their actions.
Who a person is? We love and respect him or her . . .
What a person does? Truth may require that we tell the person we love that such actions are not consonant with what God has revealed.
We can never judge a person . . . but, we can judge a person’s actions.
Jesus did it best. Remember the woman caught in adultery? The elders were going to stone her. At the words of Jesus, they walked away.
“Is there no one left to condemn you?” the Lord tenderly asked the accused woman.
“No one, Sir,” she whispered.
“Neither do I condemn you,” Jesus concluded. “Now go, but sin no more.”
Hate the sin; love the sinner . . .(Uhmm Tim, Jesus welcomed and forgave her BEFORE the 'sin no more' statement and his forgiveness was not contingent on her 'sinning no more.")
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This is Cardinal Dolan's take on why the Church loves gays but kicks them from the table. Gays have dirty hands like little Freddy. We are not to take the message that gays are dirty hands, but just that good daddies make sure there are no children with dirty hands at the dinner table.
Someone needs to sit down with Cardinal Dolan and spend some time explaining to him that Jesus did not have a contingent form of love. Jesus did not relate to people as if they were seven or eight year old children and he was some uber parent. Jesus referred to his followers as his brothers and sisters not as his children and there is nothing in the Gospels where Jesus refused to feed people if their hands were dirty.
And I don't know about Cardinal Dolan's family, but it was my mother who decided who was or was not welcome at the table in our house, and I don't remember her kicking too many people from the table for dirty hands, sexual orientation, or an alcohol problem. If she had the family ranch would have had too few to labor in it.
My buddy Freddie from across the street and I were playing outside. Mom called me for supper.
“Can Freddie stay and eat supper with us?” I asked.
“He’d sure be welcome, if it’s okay with his mom and dad,” she replied.
“Thanks, Mrs. Dolan,” Freddie replied. “I’m sure it’s okay, because mom and dad are out, and the babysitter was just going to make me a sandwich whenever I came in.”
I was so proud and happy. Freddie was welcome in our house, at our table. We both rushed in and sat down.
“Freddie, glad you’re here,” dad remarked, “but . . . looks like you and Tim better go wash your hands before you eat.”
Simple enough . . . common sense . . . you are a most welcome and respected member now of our table, our household, dad was saying, but, there are a few very natural expectations this family has. Like, wash your hands!…
So it is with the supernatural family we call the Church: all are welcome!
But, welcome to what? To a community that will love and respect you, but which has rather clear expectations defining it, revealed by God in the Bible, through His Son, Jesus, instilled in the human heart, and taught by His Church.
The Church is Catholic . . . that means all are welcome;
The Church is one . . . that means we have a Person — Jesus — and His moral teaching that unite us;
The Church is apostolic . . . that means that His teaching was entrusted to His apostles, and carefully handed-on by His Church. The sacred duty of the Church is to invite people, challenge people, to live the message and teachings of Jesus.
This balance can cause some tensions. Freddie and I were loved and welcomed at our family table, but the clear expectation was, no dirty hands!
Blessed John Paul II used to say that the best way to love someone was to tell them the truth: To teach the truth with love. Jesus did that — He was love and truth in His very person — and so does His Church.
We love and respect everyone . . . but that doesn’t necessarily mean we love and respect their actions.
Who a person is? We love and respect him or her . . .
What a person does? Truth may require that we tell the person we love that such actions are not consonant with what God has revealed.
We can never judge a person . . . but, we can judge a person’s actions.
Jesus did it best. Remember the woman caught in adultery? The elders were going to stone her. At the words of Jesus, they walked away.
“Is there no one left to condemn you?” the Lord tenderly asked the accused woman.
“No one, Sir,” she whispered.
“Neither do I condemn you,” Jesus concluded. “Now go, but sin no more.”
Hate the sin; love the sinner . . .(Uhmm Tim, Jesus welcomed and forgave her BEFORE the 'sin no more' statement and his forgiveness was not contingent on her 'sinning no more.")
************************************************
This is Cardinal Dolan's take on why the Church loves gays but kicks them from the table. Gays have dirty hands like little Freddy. We are not to take the message that gays are dirty hands, but just that good daddies make sure there are no children with dirty hands at the dinner table.
Someone needs to sit down with Cardinal Dolan and spend some time explaining to him that Jesus did not have a contingent form of love. Jesus did not relate to people as if they were seven or eight year old children and he was some uber parent. Jesus referred to his followers as his brothers and sisters not as his children and there is nothing in the Gospels where Jesus refused to feed people if their hands were dirty.
And I don't know about Cardinal Dolan's family, but it was my mother who decided who was or was not welcome at the table in our house, and I don't remember her kicking too many people from the table for dirty hands, sexual orientation, or an alcohol problem. If she had the family ranch would have had too few to labor in it.
